Nerdfighters

Hey guys,

Approximately one hour ago, my boyfriend texted me- while I was on the bus- and said he can't do this anymore. This meaning long distance.

Yes, I was stupid enough to pursue in a long distance relationship.

It lasted about 9 or 10 months.

It doesn't help that he even said he still loves me and doesn't think he will ever find somebody like me again.

I cried for a long time- a very long time. Now, I feel like throwing up because I can't cry. I think I ran out of tears.

The pain is still there though. I might sound completely fine, but I'm not, and I feel like I never will be again. I feel like I won't even like somebody like him again- much less love. 

The pain is indescribable.

I really just need those comforting words and reassurances. 

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I know it doesn't seem that way right now but it will pass. It is going to hurt so so so much for weeks, months, maybe even a couple of years, but eventually the pain will go away and a new person will come along who will treat you the way your deserve. Long distance relationships are so so hard, so try looking around you for that one special person. He might have been there all along, but you were too busy to notice him <3 

Thanks so much.

Wow that sucks. I'm so sorry! If I'm being perfectly honest, the pain of losing someone that you thought you might be with forever never really goes away. But you will move on, and you will be happy again, and eventually, when you think about him, it will just be with that sort of melencholy "what if" feeling. And I know it feels like you'll be heatbroken forever and there's really nothing you can do to piece yourself together except for wait it out. Write a series of letters to your favorite authors, go on a day trip with your mom (I found my mother was surprising helpfull in this situation) and buy shoes, dye your hair a funky color, write a screenplay, make a purse out of duct tape, just give yourself a goal because going somewhere is the first step in moving on :)

Thanks. I've actually thought about starting things that I couldn't do before because I wanted to have time to talk to him as long as possible.

You'll get over it, it's common to have violently intense immediate reactions to unappreciated bad news but as time goes on you'll soon become apathetic about the whole ordeal. Just don't go out with anybody too disgusting during your rebound period or you might make a few more mistakes that you'll regret and piling on to your suffering is never a good idea. As long as you remember that you're still young, probably too young for anything permanent to come around so you could say that a break-up was going to be inevitable, so you have plenty of time to find somebody who'll turn out to be a better match for you. If the time ever comes for you to break-up with anybody you'll know what it feels like so you won't do something totally rude and stupid like break-up over a text message. Even if he is long-distance a phone call would be nice. Maybe wait to say something until a Skype or IM chat. I don't know, you're a better person for getting your heart broken.

Woo, man I'm good at this comforting thing. I can't believe therapists get paid so much money, people could just save a lot of money by giving me just a quarter to analyze their problems for them and say a few nice things. 

Oh I forgot the nice things. 

Though you're too young for me you do appear to be suitably attractive to attract suitors or if you're a vigorous stallion of a young women you're also attractive enough to expect a yes when you ask hotties out. You won't be alone forever, people who are socially pleasant enough to start dating young rarely are, take comfort in that.

I excel at life, feel better.

Haha thanks so much. Made me laugh at some points. :)

Everything is going to be ok. Maybe he wasn't the right guy for you, maybe it will be fixed. Nonetheless I wholeheartedly believe that you are a beautiful person and will find someone to love and be with for the rest of your life. 

Stay strong and don't forget to be awesome <3 

Thank you so much. I do think it was for the best considering the distance, but that doesn't change much.

o my gosh, I'm so sorry. You must feel awful. I know you hurt, and sometime a guy will come along and sweep you off your feet. Stay strong. Rhiannon<3

Thanks Rhiannon. :)

Yes, very hard. I decided to, um.. NEVER do long distance again..

Love is a battlefield. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose: but as long as you are alive, you just keep fighting until it kills you. That's one person. One person who was special to you. Out of how many people have you talked to. There is a lot of people left in the world you haven't met: the world is overpopulated. They all are different shapes, sizes, and colors. Consider this ex-boyfriend a stepping stone for greater love in the future. Lessons learned, love experience made, resilience to pain grown.

You've got a lot of time ahead of you, so don't be giving up.

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