I need help with a friend

[Abby Weasleby]

I don't know what to do. I have a friend from work that I started talking to a lot and she is very depressed and comes to me a lot about it. I'm fine with that, I can listen. But she refuses to get any help, certain that it won't help or she'll lose her jobs or get kicked out of uni. I'm only 17 and she's in her 20s. Nothing I say ever helps and I just don't know what to do to help. She talks about cutting herself and committing suicide and has attempted to and nearly jumped before. I am talking to her right now and I'm trying to convince that the physical pain wont help with the pain she feels inside (she wants to cut herself). I feel like it is my responsibility as she has come to me but I can't see as there is anything I can do. But then when I see her at work she acts completely normal, fun and happy.

I just convinced her to wait till the morning before she does anything else, to see how she feels in the morning but I am still so worried. What can I do? I have noone to go to for her help, I don't know any people in her life (though I am fairly sure they know as well), I can't tell our boss because my friend would never forgive me and she trusts me not to tell. Besides I doubt she could do anything to help.

Please I need advice!!

[Blake Belladonna]

Which is more important, saving someone's trust or saving someone's life. Even if you have to call the cops, it's better than not telling anyone. The best thing you could do is tell someone of authority of what she has said and her intentions. she may not want help, but given the circumstances of having the cops called on her because she's so far gone in her mind, set on suicide, can change her mind to see just how truly messed up those thoughts are. Thats all I can really say. Tell an authority figure and get her help, regardless of if she wants it or not

[Nicole]

I suggest 2 things

1) be there for her

-sometimes they just need someone to help them out and support them

2)get her a hobby

-something fun like art class or even the Ning

[Stephani Dudrak]

First off, your friend, while not in her normal mind, believes she is thinking rationally. Physical pain releases endorphins that make the emotional pain feel better, but it is not a healthy coping mechanism.

Second, I agree with Mod Ding, if she's a suicide risk, you need to tell someone who can help her. She's not in her normal state of mind, and needs professional help, even if she doesn't want it.

[Matthew Trotter]

I want to add that you shouldn't let yourself get burnt out. Suicide risks can be a big drain on the people who care about them, and you need to respect your limits. You're no good to your friend if you allow yourself to be stretched too thin. Respect your own psychological health. If you need to, talk to a counselor about the stress you're facing with your friend. It's one of the best things you can do for yourself if you're struggling with a friend who is a suicide risk, and they will be able to point you to good local resources for your friend as well.

 

That said, sometimes all they need is someone who will listen to them. If you can be that, great.

[Kenny]

Keep doing what you're doing, there's not much else you can do.  Ultimately it's her life, her body, her decision.  If you can contact any of her close friends or family members then do so, but don't call 911 unless you find her on the floor bleeding to death.  The cops won't help anything, and will only serve to distance you from her.