Is Feminism Still Relevant In Todays Society?

[Kadie - Anne Elizabeth Evans]

so many of the people I know IRL have issues with feminism, they argue that either it's not relevant, or not needed. I think they do this, in part, to wind me up but also it raises an interesting point, Is it still relevant. Women now have, arguably, every opportunity than mean have. They can vote, have a career, have a family. So what do you think?

My personal opinon is that it most definatly is still relevant but I'm really intrested to hear peoples opinons who aren't just saying stuff to get a reaction out of me :P x

[Nicole Lauren]

I suppose I've never really been discriminated against, but I am only in high school. I really don't see much of a battle to fight anymore. At least not in my area... But some things I don't really want to change. I still expect some sort of gentlemen-like actions from guys (BUT, I do live in the southeastern US) and I definately don't want to have to sign up for the draft when I turn 18. I guess I just see some things as necessary and/or practical. Of course a guy should offer to open a door for a girl if appropriate, but at the same time I open the door for both guys and girls alike.

Some guys are definately pigs and some women definately take feminism a bit too far, but in my opinion the women have won. I've never really had someone tell me that women are supposed to be housekeepers, and that men are smarter than us and should do the smart/political/career/etc stuff.

BUT that doesn't mean that women can just sit back. I think that keeping our rights mean using them and demanding that we be treated equally at all times.

[Kadie - Anne Elizabeth Evans]

Mabye that's what feminism should become. In the 1900's it was sufferage, in the 60's political, sexual freedom mabye in the 21st century it should be making sure we keep the rights we've earned. I personally still think there are battles to be had but a lot of that is no longer just about women, an example might be gender steryotypes being used in an offensive way in the media.

Also, what exactly do we mean by discriminating. I find a lot of traditional "gentleman-ly" behaviour actually quite insulting. I don't like it implied that I need a man to fight my battles for me. Perhaps it's merely a cultral difference (you mentioned you were from the southeastern US).

[Nicole Lauren]

Like I said, I've never really faced discrimination, but I can see what you mean about the media. The media does an awful lot of objectifying and so on, but I guess it's never really affected me in a note-worthy way. I usually consider 90% of media kind of stupid and most likely twisted away from the truth.

And I can see what you mean about the culture difference. Honestly, it's never bothered me that a guy should offer to pay for a meal on a date, but at the same time a girl should offer to pay almost or just as often, in my opinion. A lot of it is just cultural courtesy. Like the opening the door and defending your girlfriend if a mugger comes up. I'm sure that about 90% of the future guys I date will be somewhat stronger than me and that much more capable of taking on a 6'3'' attacker.

But when you get into the whole taking on non-physical problems like someone being rude to you or arguing your point, etc. a guy should NOT step in ever, unless you ask him to. Women are fully capable of handling themselves in debate and other important matters. And just because a mom is a mom, that doesn't mean that she should automatically quit her career for her kids - unless she wants to.

AND, some of it is just tradition. I think it would be adorable if my future husband asked my father for permission to marry me just out of courtesy, respect, and tradition, but I know a LOT of girls who would find that highly insulting and really get angry at their significant others over that. Out of the south, it would probably be very rude and controlling. In the south, and to people who don't mind, it's just something cute like getting your girlfriend a box of candy on valentines or paying for the first date.

[Kadie - Anne Elizabeth Evans]

Yeah. If a guy asked my dad if he could marry him I would dump him. I find it to be, like you said, controlling and demining. It is in no way up to my father who I should or should not marry. In my eyes it's my choice and mine alond and if anyone else tried to decide it for me I would be seriously pissed.

Also, mabye cause it's that I'm like 5'11", but I would find it very annoying if a guy stepped in, in a situation where I might come to physical harm unless it is clear I need help. That sentence doesn't make complete sense but yeah. I hate it when it's implied I'm not as stong as a guy simply cause I'm a girl, things like "you should never hit girls" really annoy me. I mean, come on, you should never hit anyone.

[Nicole Lauren]

Yeah... it's a bit hard to explain, but it's not really about asking the father. If the dad actually says no or makes a big deal about it, well, your dad is kind of a *insert bad word here*. And if your boyfriend actually goes along with the no, well, that's not really a good thing either. But it's mostly about respecting the woman. A long time ago, it was meant to be a sort of making it legit thing. If you didn't have your family's acceptance, then it wasn't a good thing for the woman.

Now it's just a cute thing to do in the south. It doesn't really carry any meaning other than tradition and respect for the woman and her family. And ultimately, it's the woman's choice. It's just something cute? I'm explaining this badly, haha.

It is probably cause you are 5'11''! Or maybe you're quite strong. Honestly, I don't really do school sports or karate lessons or anything. My physical activity is just running a mile or two when I get home. If I ever faced a guy attacker, I would be dead meat. Perhaps it's my responsibility as a modern woman to learn how to defend myself with force rather than just tactics... but in any case, I agree with the hitting thing. Stupid violence is just stupid.

[Kadie - Anne Elizabeth Evans]

I understand the traditional roots of asking the brides father permission to marry her. (I'm a big jane austen fan :P) but I just don't see it as apporiate in modern society. I persoanlly also think far from being respectful it's disrespectful, even if it carries no real weight. But that's just my personal opinion.

Can I ask if you get married would you take your husbands name? Would you make a speech?

BTW I'm not trying to attack you or your culture or your opinions, I'm just interested. I hope it doesn't come across that I'm attacking you. :) x

and you're right - stupid violence is stupid!

[Nicole Lauren]

Nah, don't worry about it :) And I'm probably a bit more different than most people in the south. My family has been in the SE US since the late 1600s, so traditions kinda carry. I suppose you'd have to consider the intentions behind it all... but I can see why you would see it as disrespectful. I suppose it's just not to some and to others it is.

As for the last name... hmm, I've thought of it before, and unless my husband had a god awful last name, I'd probably take it. If I didn't like his last name, I suppose I wouldn't. But to me it never really seemed like an oppresive act.

But I have a good friend who is a crazy big feminist and she would NEVER take a man's last name, so I guess it depends.

[Kadie - Anne Elizabeth Evans]

yeah, I'm keeping my name if I get married but the main reason is so I cancall my kid Lily Evans. :D (It's a harry potter refernece if you havn't read the books).

That's cool that your family have been in the same place for so long, my family is from all over europe. :P

[Nicole Lauren]

YES. Harry Potter is excellent. And naming your kid Lily Evans = excellent as well! I'd definately name my kid Harry if I didn't think he would get made fun of for it.

And I think it's cool that you're from Europe, especially the UK. I'm incredibly jealous. I love the US and all, but Europe has a lot of history and art that the US lacks.

[Kadie - Anne Elizabeth Evans]

Don't get me wrong I love living in europe, but my family is just from all over the place. Say any country in europe and my family probably has roots there :D

[Nicole Lauren]

But that's still awesome! You can travel around visiting them. I'll have to wait for university to ever visit Europe :(

[Kadie - Anne Elizabeth Evans]

The travel thing is true, well... It would be true if I had money.