Nerdfighters

I have always had a love for really lame jokes and I thought maybe the Nerdfighters like them too.

Here are my favourites:

How do you get a group of Pikachu on a bus?
You poke-em-on.

Why did the boy fall off his bike?
Because his mum threw a fridge at him.

How about you?

Tags: funny, jokes, lame, lame-jokes, lowsy

Views: 43396

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Yes, they are bad, that is why I love them so much. I would have to say that the best one (in my opinion) is the one about the stick.
I looove the stick one. I've heard it before, and it still cracks me up =D
This one once won me a prize in a pun contest at an SF Convention. Be warned.

Have you heard they have proven that plants can communicate feelings? It can't speak, but when you squash a grape it gives a little wine.
This is fantastic!
Hey, wine a little, you'll feel better. Life is a cabernay. (actual t-shirts, available at vineyards near my home).

I say

-knock knock

My friend says 

-Who's there

I say

-banana

He says

-nigga, your wasting my time!!!

 

Alright, here's one my 6th period teacher told us:

A no-armed man goes into a church and asks if he can get a job there. The man he talks to says, "The only job we have is the person who tells our bell ringer when to ring the bell every hour." The no-armed man accepts the job.
The next day on his first day of work, he tries to find the man to tell him it's two o'clock. When he cannot find the man, he panics and rings the bell by banging his forehead against it. Only afterward does he realize that the man he was looking for was on the other side of the bell tower. Unfortunately, the man is so surprised, he falls off the tower and onto the street below.
By some miracle, he survives. After pushing his way through a crowd that had gathered around the man, the town mayor comes to the man and asks: "Who did this to you?" The man responds, "I don't remember his name, but his face rings a bell."

sorry it's so long...
In the primitive days of man they didn't understand how the sun and moon and stars worked. A caveman always saw the sun go down but when he woke up and stepped out of the cave the sun was already in the sky and on the opposite side from where it went down and he wondered how it got there. So one night he camped outside the cave and forced himself to stay up all night. Hours and hours went by in the dark while he pondered how the sun worked... and then all of a sudden it dawned on him.

If beavers had money, how often would they see a dentist? Would it be covered by home insurance?

Did you hear about the tomato that was behind but was able to catchup?

A duck walks into a drug store and says Give me some Chapstick and put it on my bill.

A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

A baby seal walks into a club.
Nerdfighter: Did you hear about that famous actress who committed suicide by stabbing herself at dinner? Her name was Reese something...

Decepticon: uhh Reese Witherspoon?

Nerdfighter: No, with her fork!!!! lol

Credit goes to my friend Colin
Why does E.T. have such big eyes?
Because he saw his phone bill. O.O

This one is my favourite:
Have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower?
That's because he hides well. ;)
A man walks into a bar with a giraffe and they proceed to get blitzed. The giraffe drinks so much it passes out on the floor. The man gets up and heads for the door to leave when the bartender yells, “Hey! You can’t leave that lyin’ there!” The drunk replies, “That’s not a lion! It’s a giraffe.”

Two fish are in a tank; One looks over at the other and says "DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DRIVE THIS THING!!!"

What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Lean Beef.

Why did the cow paint his hoofs red?
TO HIDE IN THE CHERRY TREES!!!

What? You have never seen a cow in the cherry tree? Shows just how well he is hiding!

What do you call epileptic lettuce?
Seizure salad.

Why did the baker bake more bread?
He kneaded the dough.
Yeah, some of those really random, not so funny, jokes are actually sometimes most funny for me because some jokes are just too dumb. :P Also, there are some random ones like : How to get an elephant red. Choke it... that is just cruel :(

RSS

© 2014   Created by Hank Green.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service