And is it influenced by previous experiences either in the department of previous friends/relationships or from fictional stories you've heard?  Does anyone seek out someone to be either their friend or boyfriend/girlfriend because this person reminds them of a well known fictional or non-fictional character?  

What are some of the weirder things that influence your attraction to others?  I personally know that I have this thing with ears and eyebrows where if they're both really impressive, I find that pretty sweet.  I also know that I used to seek out people who reminded me of professor Lupin either as friends or more than friends.  XD  

What's the most important for spending time with a person - looks?  money?  ability to make you laugh?  ability to talk seriously?  car?  

We've been talking about attraction (either sexual or platonic) in my psychology class, and now I'm really curious about the nerdfighter community's opinions on it.  So, what makes YOU fall into nerdfighter-like?  

Tags: attraction, friendship, like, nerdfighter, psychology, romance

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Well when I imagine my perfect nerd girl she loves Star Wars, reading and books, cartoons, video games, YouTube, and comics and superheroes(especially Batman). I would love for her to be very beautiful, very smart and intelligent, hard working, and open minded. I want her to have a beautiful smile, a cute laugh, kind of long hair, meat on her bones, a good sense of humor, and freckles would be nice. I want to be able to goof off, but then be able to get in a real discussion involving morals, ethics, philosophy, and even metaphysics.

This is pretty much my perfect girl. I don't like doing this though, because if I meet a girl and she doesn't have one of these qualities then she's already below expectations.
I look for some one like myself. with whom i dont have bend my ideals.
So he should most importantly - love reading books, love Harry Potter, be a vegetarian.

Then about looks... i do like dark haired, again coz i love Harry Potter.

N while spending time, ability to make me laugh is as important as ability to talk seriously.
I like men who are passionate about something- music, litterature, science, etc. Also I prefer an optimist, I don't like gloomy people who complain all the time. He has to love travelling, also he has to love some of the things that I love. I would like someone sensitive but strong at the same time. Not too introverted and shy because there's a chance I myself may never go and talk to them : (
Obviously if someone's a nerdfighter that tends to help. A guy who likes some of the things I like (Doctor Who, Harry Potter, StarKidPotter, LOTR, books in general, sci fi, fantasy....) would be nice, but really, as long as he doesn't mind me being obsessed with these things, and supports that and listens to me when I go all fangirl for DH2.... I'll be happy. Compliments are nice. Being reasonably not-unattractive tends to help... An ability to actually have conversation with him would also be very much appreciated. I like to debate without being worried that it will end in a fist fight. Intelligence is big. Acceptance of diversity is big.
I think the thing that really makes me like another person is realizing that they genuinely like me. Not necessarily in a romantic way, just as a person. Like, once a guy sees how strange I am and then says something like "You're so cool" it's pretty hard not to be a little taken with him. I think one of the greatest things about finding other nerds is finding people that like, understand, and appreciate oddity.
someone who doesn't immediately feel the need to check facebook.... someone who can make more than small talk or medium talk. Someone who isn't thinking about what they'll say next while i'm talking. Someone to discuss books/movies/TV/youtube/all things awesome with. Someone who makes me laugh as mush as they make me think about what i do and who i am. Someone who loves me for who i am. Someone who teaches me how to be more nerdy than i already am :)
maybe it's lame and impossible but i can hope :)

TRUE nerds aren't popular enough to get to talk to members of the opposite sex so they have to resort to staring at people from the opposite end of the classroom like the creeper nerd they are.
It would be great if my perfect nerd guy loves Harry Potter, Starkid, Youtube, and isn't embarrassed by other nerdy things like that. He would do his own thing and isn't afraid of what others think. He can be musically inclined and interested in school. He has to be interested in politics and activism like me, and can discuss controversial issues in an educated way.
I suppose my ideal is kind of based around a fictional character. My ideal boyfriend would be like Samwise Gamgee. He doesn't have to be the bravest or the coolest or the funniest or even the smartest. But he would be compassionate and loyal, and stand by me when things get tough and he'd help me to see the light even when things get tough. He can't be clingy or terribly needy (BIG issue, clingy needy guys scare me off quickly). He wouldn't feel the need to prove himself, he just is who he is and he's comfortable with himself. He needs to be down to earth, because I spend so much time up in the clouds I need someone to bring me back down and keep me grounded at least sometimes. And being able to cook well doesn't hurt either. ;)
Man, i know EXACTLY what you mean. XD I've never thought about it before, but I suppose my ideal right now is kind of Samwise Gamgee ish. Not quite, but basically all the things you stated here. Maybe a combination of Sam and Pippin.

So many people pay attention to Legolas. Hobbits are totally where it's at. XD
Aw, don't fret! There are lazy girls everywhere! If that's what you truly want, I'm sure you can find someone to sit dramatically in various places while you go off on adventures!

(seriously dude. Eowyn's soooo much cooler)

Evidently Faramir has this big cult following. Who knew?

All you have to do to tell how many people want to get it on with each character is to go on fanfiction dot net, choose that character as character A, and choose the genre as romance. Faramire has 635. I'm too scared to check Legolas.
Oh yeah. I could probably write the book on how relationships should NOT be. ^_^' It's nice to hear everyone in nerddom's views on what should be, though. Because I do agree.

I think generally the key with relationships is to not view it as a relationship. It's not something you posess, and it's not your dynamic or something, and it's not an actual, physical thing that exists in the real world. It is an actual other person, and you have to know before anything else that this is another human, and they have fears and wants and good traits and bad ones. Being in love is wanting to know all of these things about another person. If you're lucky, the need to know is a positive, beautiful thing, like working out a puzzle. But it can also be a violent need, or it can be a desperate need. It can basically be anything other than a bored wondering.

Faramir is pretty baddass. If I may confess now, I wasn't a huge fan of the books, and didn't finish all of them. So most of my opinions are based off vague memories of what I did read of the books and not-so-vague memories of the movies. >_<

And I just happen to have a beef with Arwen. She doesn't truly deserve my contempt. I'm just an Eowyn fan. So I must dislike Arwen. I think it's a fandom rule or something. :-P


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