My friend (yes actually my friend not me :P) is pansexual/bisexual and has recently been having problems at school. He is such a fantastic person, just like every lovely quality you can have - but this one rude, horrible ball of suck at school has been harassing him about his sexuality.
This boy insults him almost daily and is seriously (emotionally, not physically (thank dead-god)) hurting my friend. My friend has brought it up with school officials but they "didn't have enough evidence" and refused to do anything.
I live 2 hours away from my friend and the only way I can really comfort him is through Facebook. He is thinking of changing schools but is unable to because of various factors. This is so hard for him and he is such a great guy.
I know that stories of encouagement and things like "It Gets Better...." can really be helpful so please, please, would you mind telling me some stories about your own experiences I could forward him? It doesn't matter what YOUR sexuality is, but if you'd been bullied in the past - how did you deal with it?
Thank you so much! I hope you can help him.
I have not been bullied about my sexuality but I know many people who have. The best thing you could do for your is have as many of his friends just stand by him no matter what. Show him that he has people who care and that out does any of the negative feelings he is getting. I think its great that he has you there for him and it must mean the world to him.
If this boy keeps insulting him then use a witty come back (as us nerd's are quite good at :P ) make him stumble over his words so he just seems like a non intelligent prick.
In the end if changing schools is his last option for your friend it might just be for the best.
As Sarah said witty comebacks. Also I know pity card goes a long way against bullies as does friends who are intimidating threatening the person to back off or just being there with the heir of "do something I dare you see what happens" is a good thing as well.
I've been bullied but not for my sexuality. Brains and a good group of friends is key to survival in any case though.
Is the ball of suck seeking your friend out to harangue him?
It really sucks to hear that this is still happening! I've never had the experience of being bullied like that, but I have some ideas.
1. Has he told his parents so they can approach the school together. Like hold a meeting with your parents, the school officials, and you to tell them that what's happening is now okay and that it should be stopped.
2. Tell your parents and get them to drive you over there and hang out with him in person.
3. Get over there and rip the balls from the ball of suck (I know violence isn't the answer but I just had to say that.)
Basically what I'm getting at is to talk to someone. I've seen the "It get's better" stuff and while I agree that it does, sometimes you need to make it better yourself first.
It's really sad that these things still happen. "It gets better" is motivational sure, but that's far off in the future, and what's happening to him in the present is indeed very serious. I would recommend him see a counselor, be it inside school or outside, for readily available support, if nothing else. If the school officials really refuse to do anything, at least he can develop coping strategies with a professional.
You could look for some help on http://www.makeitbetterproject.org/ They don't like to sit around and wait for it to get better, which I think is a step in the right direction.