Hanna Is Not A Boys Name

Hanna Is Not A Boy’s Name is what I would classify as sugarcoated horror. It takes horror subjects and situations and puts them in an odd and a somewhat stupid light. Mostly this is because I fail completely at taking myself seriously. As for what it’s about, the best I can sum it up is it’s about Hanna, a guy who desperately wants to be a paranormal investigator but kind of sucks at it and has a handful of his own problems told by a guy who died ten years ago and seems very lukewarm about it all. That was totally a run on sentence. Mostly, this is about Hanna and his failings and (sometime) successes despite the zombie guy being the one telling the story. It is kind of a story about a person finding themselves because we all have to at one point.
-Tessa Stone
Characters
{...}
Your narrator and dead for [at least] ten years, { … } has grown bored of contemplating life and his own lack thereof. As he is unable to remember much of anything, he no longer dwells on it, finding that he would rather spend his time creating new memories instead of straining to call upon things that are clearly gone. So he somehow found himself at the doorstep of Hanna Falk Cross, a wanna-be paranormal investigator who ends up messing up more than not. Despite Hanna’s seemingly constant failures however, he is quite content with being Hanna’s partner and sincerely tries to aid in all of the smaller man’s endeavors.

Not much is known about him, even so much as what he is. Though he is frequently referred to as ‘zombie’ for those who aren’t creative enough [or weird enough] to come up with a new name for him each time, he lacks the desire to feast upon any brains, and while his visible emotions may seem to range from indifferent to mildly concerned, it seems fairly obvious that { … } has a good range of feelings. He falls apart, stitches back together, is dry of blood, and has a small aversion to anything very wet. He’s also told that the white shocks of hair on his head resemble angel wings, but he assures you he is anything but. So in short, he simply just is with no real explanation.

Hanna
Hanna is best described as an overly enthusiastic, obnoxious child in the body of a twenty four year old man. Yes, he’s twenty four, yes he would love it if you bothered to remember, yes he can drink, and yes ladies, he’s single. Hanna finds glee in almost every aspect of his life, even the things that suck. He seems to believe that without your hardknock experiences you are ill suited to better appreciate the good things that come into your life. While that may seem wise beyond his years, don’t give up too much hope because he regularly exudes a far more pressing childlike innocence and naivety. It’s that same naivety that has him INSISTING upon being a paranormal investigator when it seems rather obvious to everyone that he’s not all that great at it.

He at least is semi-prepared. Hanna’s weapon of choice is a hammer with some sort of rune on it and a magic marker in which to write more runes. This is his primary way of casting and so far it seems to do him well enough in that he’s not DEAD yet. That amounts for something! There are a lot of oddities about Hanna [besides his behavior] that are yet to be explained and he always would rather change the subject awkwardly than answer any questions even if, like a big hypocrite, he will ask you a million questions about yourself and expect you to answer with the greatest sincerity.

All in all, Hanna is not the sharpest crayon in the box but he is, at least, the most loyal of them all.