This is my first and it's in the works. First 2 chapters are up.
You could use some editing, but the basic story's good. Love Dinotopia :)
I think the biggest thing is that it seems unfinished to me. It may just be how that website works, but I think your two chapters could be one, and you could expand what you've got. Like right now it seems like you've got an outline more than a story, which is fine, you just need to flesh it out some.
I was planning on having that ending, then give a background story, and make the story lead up to that ending.
I mean more sensation details :) like knowing more to place you in the story. Just being honest, but someone else might disagree with me.