An Abundance of Thoughts about an Abundance of Katherines: Chapter Nine

[Frank Leigh Grace]

            Ick, we’re really in for some trouble with TOC, aren’t we?  “I don’t think too highly of that boy’s daddy,” says Starnes.  Yessir, Colin Lyford is definitely going to have a significant role in this story.  I’m really worried somebody’s going to die.

            That sounds great, firing only one person per family during the depression.  Of course, that really only works when you’re employing multiple people from each family in the first place, so it’s not like most companies can do that.

            “She never married, of course.  Uglier than sin, bless her heart.”  I’m doomed.

            “They were cowards, too.  Everyone is.”  Well, I know I am.  Fear has controlled my actions quite a few more times than I like to admit to myself, but I admit it to myself anyway.

            So Starnes and his wife ended with #3, death.  I swear there’ll be more #3 by the end of this story, and I’m not going to like it.  But oh, how I feel with Colin right here, with him wanting so desperately that Katherine always by his side, for fifty years or more.  All I want is that and a job I enjoy.  He wants that and eternal glory.

            “He’s pretty touchy on the whole subject of his being unbearable.”  Yeah, I can see that.  I’m pretty touchy on that, too, and it’s not like I’ve been dumped nineteen times.  It still just hurts to think that no guy can abide to be near me for much time.

            “If you touch her, I’ll kill you.”  Yeah, Something about young Mr. Lyford is striking me as disastrous.  This is not going to have a happy ending, this bit.  “Very important talk.”  He’s incredibly jealous.  “Who’s the genius?” Colin’s going to have to be careful with that one.  Which could prove difficult, knowing that Colin doesn’t always have too much tact.  TOC is touchy.  Dangerously touchy.

            Eh.  I have a big nose.

            Yeah, I agree with Hassan about the “good person” thing.  He’s got rules in place that are supposed to help protect us, but the things he really cares about is that we care about Him and others.

            And of course Colin can’t help but think of K-19.  “Dumpees don’t call.  No exception.”  I texted David the other day, but we weren’t ever in a relationship, so technically he didn’t dump me, and I want to remain friends. I will continue to text him every so often.  Because I care about him.  It’s not like I’m still trying to get him to go out with me; I gave up on that.

            For all Colin complains about not being a genius, he and Hassan really do have great imaginations.  And to think, all this came out of John’s head.  My hat goes off to you.  Except I wasn’t wearing a hat.  Well, we’ll pretend.

            Well, good to know I’m not a normal kid.  I mean, I guess I knew that.  But still, even the idea of coming home at 3 am reeking of booze makes me shudder.  Mostly because drunk-me would be a terrifying sight, I guess. I guess the 3 am thing is happening more and more often.

            Still, Colin remembers exceedingly well.  There are things I find interesting that I still can’t help but forget.  It really depends on the robustness of the connections you are able to forge.

            See, I never do things the way Colin does them.  I do them enough to be able to do them in a “sufficient” manner, a “good enough” amount.  I’m bad at working.  Pretty much the only times I’m able to satisfactorily study is when I’m studying with another person.  Otherwise, I end up distracted or daydreaming or on the internet somewhere, and the studying never happens.  Unless it’s a memorizing thing, like vocabulary in Spanish or Psychology.  That’s easy.  It’s a task with a clear-cut end, whereas with other studying I don’t really know where the stopping point is besides “when I run out of time,” so the task of studying looms up, monolithic and unsurpassable, and I cower away from it and hide in my daydreams.

            Focus is a beautiful thing.  Pretty much the only times I achieve it is while reading a good book or while taking a test (most of the time).  At the end of first semester, I was sitting NEXT TO Rudy II while taking the engineering exam, and had not a single thought about him for the entire two hours.  Mmmmm, focus.

            Hey, Lindsey plays games against herself, too!  She keeps reminding me of me.  It’s weird, in the first reading she was reminding me more of Lauren than of me, but now I’m usually seeing me.  Hmm.

            …Why is Lindsey touching him?

            “You can’t make new words out of thin air.”  David and I did.  We came up with a new word.  I typed it up and a whole explanation for it but then got rid of it because…it’s ours.  Which is stupid, I know, because HE certainly doesn’t care, but for whatever reason…I want to keep that word to ourselves.  Our word.  Proof that we were friends or something.  Proof that we knew each other.  Proof that we were more than just math buddies for Calc 3.

            Yeah, Lindsey’s like me in that she doesn’t want to be famous.  And there was a time that I didn’t want to leave home; would have stayed here forever.  But the idea of living in a place like Gutshot for my whole life doesn’t give me a good feeling.  I’m worried enough that I’m going to become bored in the cute little town my manufacturing plant is in.  I’m afraid of the unknown, it’s true, but sometime in the past couple of years I decided I wanted to make myself grow.  So I went to a school out-of-state.  And I got into the co-op program.  And I got into a study abroad program.  And even though it’s hard that I’m not going to see my friends for a semester every other semester (except I can totally drive up to my college on weekends so that’s not altogether true), I’m glad I’m doing it.  Because I need it.  I hope, if Lindsey survives this story, that she doesn’t come to regret her decisions to stay in Gutshot.

            Aww, yeah Lindsey, teach that boy to tell a story.

            But WHAT THE HECK BOY KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF LINDSEY.  Oh God oh God oh God this is NOT going to be pretty.  Even though Colin Singleton would make a WAY better boyfriend than Colin Lyford.  But holy crap this is NOT going to end well.

            “There’s no romance in geometry.”  Oh, really??  It’s always math, honey—it’s ALWAYS MATH.

           

The Beginning (of the Middle)

 

            I still don’t understand how he meets and dates this many Katherines.

            “They want to stay friends; they feel smothered; it’s always them and it’s never you; and afterward, you’re devastated and they’re relieved; it’s over for them and just starting for you.”  God, John, you are amazing.  Except David doesn’t seem to want to stay friends.  WHY NOT.  AM I REALLY THAT UNBEARABLE?!?

            My experience with guys is also monotonous.  They seem to like me at first, but it turns out the whole time they were looking for something else the whole time, so they settled with me.  Justin wanted a guy.  Chris wanted the ex-girlfriend he was still in love with and eventually got back together with.  David wanted a bottomless box of happiness and awesome.